Today I turned 50—while in Corfu, Greece.
If you had told me on my last birthday that I’d be in a country that had been on my bucket list since 2000, I don’t know if I would have believed you.
But here I am.
It’s been a day—and quite a trip so far. I have definitely further defined my style of travel, which has been quite different from what this trip has entailed.
This trip was, in part, to determine if I want to have Albania as one of my seasonal “homes.” And so far, the answer is…I don’t know.
I also don’t know what I’m doing or where I’m going as of Monday.
Do I want to stay in Albania? And if yes, where?
So far, there hasn’t been a place that I’ve felt was a good fit.
Greece was just to spend my birthday in a country I hadn’t been to before. It was finally really close to where I was going to be, and it felt fitting to do a bucket-list thing for my 50th birthday.
We’ll be back to Albania tomorrow and staying in a place we haven’t been to yet. Maybe it will click for me. There is another place we passed while going from one town to the next that looked really appealing, too.
As up in the air as the rest of my trip is, it’s a pretty good metaphor for my life in general.
I feel like I hit the reset button this year, and I’m still in a transition period—in limbo, really. I haven’t figured everything out yet.
And that feels so uncomfortable.
I think we’re conditioned to believe that by the time we reach 50, we’re supposed to have things figured out. We should know where we’re going, what we’re doing, and what the next chapter looks like.
And here I am, on my 50th birthday, in Greece, still asking myself, Okay…so what now?
But maybe that’s not such a bad place to be.
After all, a year ago I had no idea I’d be spending my 50th birthday in Greece. I didn’t even know what this life I was imagining would actually look like. I just knew I wanted something different.
And now I’m here.
Even if I don’t click with Albania as a place to stay for a longer “be a temporary resident” type stay, it was so worth visiting to find that out.
It is absolutely gorgeous.
The water is either a sapphire blue or pure turquoise—so perfect-looking you’d swear the water was dyed. It doesn’t look real.
And add in the mountain backdrops?
Absolutely stunning.
So maybe this trip isn’t about finding the answer to where do I belong?
Maybe it’s about continuing to collect pieces of the answer.
A beach town here. A neighborhood there. A place that feels like home for a season. A place that doesn’t quite fit. A place I love visiting but wouldn’t want to live.
I’m still figuring it out.
And apparently, that’s what 50 looks like for me.
And honestly? I’m pretty curious to see what comes next. 🧜♀️🌎
Leave a Reply